The Ever Elusive Niyama

by Scribe

Contentment. I don’t even know what to say about this niyama. I wonder if the struggle to be content has anything to do with the sorts of expectations I have learned to create. It always seems that life will be better once “……” And yet I know what it is to be content in moments, hours of life. The most pervasive feeling that accompanies contentment for me is gratitude. When I am grateful it is much easier to be present and attentive to others and less focused on what I imagine I am lacking.

Niyama #2 Santosa (Contentment)

Santosa is the Niyama or personal observance meaning contentment.  We are meant to be at peace with ourselves and our situations in life.  This has struck me as a very difficult practice to keep active in our society today.

We ask ourselves to be better constantly.  We must be thinner, more shapely.  American Women must have a bigger bust, and smaller waist, men must have those six-pack abs, and large pectoral muscles.  Boys can not cry, girls can not be assertive.  We are told at every step to shut off our emotions and disconnect with our bodies.

We must have a better house, better car, bigger income.  We need to eat the trendy food, at the trendy restaurant.  Our kids need to go to the best schools, wear the best clothes from the “right” store.  We have Tivo to skip commercials, pause our show, fast forward, rewind the tv.  We have Cell Phones so that we can be reached anywhere in the world at any time of day.

I have found that we have lost the definition of contentment.  To live within the moment and find the peace that it provides.

I have found that to arrive at Santosa we need to turn inward.  Find the place inside where we find self-esteem and confidence.  If we can find that for ourselves, we can instill it in our children.

Yoga Reflection: The second Niyama – Santosa or Contentment

I think that the second Niyama – Santosa or Contentment is something that many of us struggle with in this day and age. If you look within our culture, we are taught to always compare ourselves to others. All of the commercials that you see on television are ridden with things that tell us we’re not quite good enough. We’re not good enough unless we drive this car, or live in this house, or wear this makeup, or weigh this much. And I think that after time this takes a toll on our Santosa.

There was once a study done that looked at the ‘happiest countries’ on Earth. The United States was far from the top of this list. If I remember correctly, the country at the top of the list was Denmark. When some people of Denmark were asked why they thought they were so content, most of them replied that they didn’t need much to be happy. They had a roof over their head, food to eat, and the love of their families. That was enough. They were then asked whether they thought people from the U.S. would be happy if they moved to Denmark. The people replied, ‘No’ that they didn’t think so. When asked why, they stated that they didn’t think what they had would be enough for Americans to be happy with.

So it almost appears as though some Americans have doomed themselves to live in this cycle of feeling like they never have enough which causes them great unhappiness and un-fulfillment in their lives. And I don’t think that driving the right car or living in the right house is going to cure this because then there will always be something bigger or better to get next. Sometimes I will catch myself wishing for certain things. I hope that I can stop this, because I really should be content. I have everything I could ever need. The love of my family, a roof over my head, and food to eat, ever y day of my life. What more should I be asking for?